You know how at every Christmas party, there’s someone who turns up late, brings a rubbish Secret Santa present, and generally embarrasses everyone?
Hello, sorry I’m late, sorry this is late and so shoddy. Where’s the dancefloor?
In fact, I’m so very late with this that it barely counts as a Christmas present at all does it? It’s more of a New Year’s gift. And that gives me an idea…
Best in Slot Healer Resolutions for 2010
As told by a slightly drunk Leafy to that pretty woman from accounts in the inappropriate dress…
1. Take a while to sit back and enjoy the lore - this expansion is just chock full of the crunchy, lovely lores. Each new zone is much more a geographical representation of a storyline that a place where you quest. And, if you’re into the healz, as so many of us are, there’s so much world-healing to be done. Have you seen my newly-erected world pillar? Feel free to touch it. It’s rock hard. Literally.
2. Learn to Love Ultimate Triage - remember that dreadful quest in Theramore, back in the day? Where you had to triage patients to get the next level of First Aid? That’s our new playstyle, that is. And there’s only one way to prepare. You’re going to need wit, humour and an eye for damage. So, rent entire series of M*A*S*H, and get to grips with life in wartime…
3. This space to let. Apply Leafshine t. Druid, that inn in the Dwarven section of Stormwind, Eastern Kingdoms. Reasonable rates.
4. Come to Terms with Your Inner Healer - This is clearly an expansion where Blizzard expects - nay, demands, that we are altaholics. The 80 to 85 content is barely going to cover an average weekend holed up in a dingy motel while the heat with the cops dies down after the last time you… Oh. So other people don’t spend time like that? Never mind. The 80 to 85 content isn’t going to last very long at all, so you’re going to be levelling alts. And you’re going to end up dual-speccing to healing. Face it. You’re too used to not queueing for randoms. However attractive standing at the back and pewpewing might seem, given a 20 minute wait for some hardcore Stonecore, you’re be back in bandages as soon as you can say “dual-spec me harder, baby”.
5. Don’t Leave Your Staff in the Ground - you just know a Worgen will urinate on it to territory mark. Bad dog!
6. Make http://www.leafshine.net your homepage. You KNOW it makes sense.
7. Don’t Hit On The Stonemother. She’s Ratters’ Girl Now. (Link: http://needmorerage.blogspot.com/2010/12/across-cavern-our-eyes-met.html)
8. Make a Point of Admiring Druid Healers’ Gear. It ain’t going to make them feel any better about what’s been done to tree form, but you have an outside chance of scoring, so it’s got to be worth a go, right? “Hey, darlin’, that Tier 11 you’re wearing would look great on my floor…”
9. Race and Name Change - You’ll need this to keep raiding if you’ve followed New Years’ Resolution #8 closely enough.
10. Don’t Stand In The Fire. Unless you really need that Feat of Strength.
Now, fetch your coat, and let’s blow this place…